No regrets is a phrase thrown around like a badge of honor. Tattoos, songs and marketing taglines all boast this notion of curating a liberated life that you wouldn’t alter, change or modify in any way. But are we missing something? Best-selling author, Daniel H. Pink has done extensive research for his new book, The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward, and believes that the feeling of regret isn't just something that makes us human, it actually gives us hope.

Daniel Pink is the author of seven books, including the New York Times bestsellers When and A Whole New Mind — as well as the #1 New York Times bestsellers Drive and To Sell is Human. Dan’s books have won multiple awards, have been translated into 42 languages, and have sold millions of copies around the world.

Dan was also the host and co-executive producer of “Crowd Control,” a television series about human behavior on the National Geographic Channel that aired in more than 100 countries. Before venturing out on his own 20 years ago, Dan worked in politics and in government, including serving as chief speechwriter to Vice President Al Gore.

Topics

(3:56) Speed round questions

(7:48) How Dan started to lean into his own regrets.

(10:49) The complex emotion of regret.

(12:16) Will we regret switching our answers on a test?

(16:33) How Dan has compiled data on regret.

(18:55) How our regrets change as we age.

(22:11) Can we anticipate our regrets?

(26:29) How our unique moral code affects our regrets.

(29:40) The Four Core Regrets.

(33:47) What didn’t go in Dan's book.

(39:45) The power of self compassion.

(41:35) Why regret gives us hope.

(46:40) What music would Dan never regret listening to?

(50:40) Grooving Session with Kurt and Tim recapping the Four Core Regrets and what we can learn from them.

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Daniel H. Pink Books

The Power Of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward: https://amzn.to/3gpU1C9

Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us: https://amzn.to/3gpUcgN

To Sell is Human: The Surprising Truth About Moving Others: https://amzn.to/3Laj0aU

When: The Scientific Secrets of Perfect Timing: https://amzn.to/3rtspCM

Links

Episode 171: Self Control, Belonging, and Why Your Most Dedicated Employees Are the Ones To Watch Out For with Roy Baumeister: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/self-control-belonging-and-why-your-most-dedicated-employees-are-the-ones-to-watch-out-for-with-roy-baumeister/

“Commission, Omission, and Dissonance Reduction: Coping with Regret in the "Monty Hall" Problem”: shorturl.at/wEU58

Jonathan Haidt, “The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion: https://amzn.to/3Glfdnq

Musical Links

Simon & Garfunkel “The Sound of Silence”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAEppFUWLfc&ab_channel=SimonGarfunkelVEVO

Ella Fitzgerald Live in Berlin “Mack The Knife”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qVxtdQgLjuQ

J.S. Bach “Adagio”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ywL_zokELE

Three Dog Night “Mama Told Me Not To Come”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DTCyjYjsVc8&ab_channel=Moondoggy

Men Without Hats “Pop Goes The Word”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3zUUtf7gOe8&ab_channel=MenWithoutHatsVEVO

Bob Seger “Turn The Page”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3khH9ih2XJg&ab_channel=jimmej955

No Regrets? Really? Why Regrets Actually Bring Us Hope | Daniel H. Pink

Behavioral Grooves Podcast