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Substack Link:

https://teenagersuntangled.substack.com/

A number of you have been using the word ‘failure’ or ‘failing’ when describing your parenting, and I think it’s heartbreaking because it betrays an attitude to our role that sees it as all or nothing, rather than the incredible journey we are all on.

The most amazing thing is to be able to tell our kids when we think we might have misjudged something, or got upset, that we are sorry and we’d like to have another go.

It teaches our kids that relationships are messy and that getting things wrong is inevitable. It releases them from thinking that when they get things wrong it’s a catastrophe, and allows them to see that relationships take time and effort and the ability to be humble; all of which is incredibly valuable in a world that’s selling a binary approach to the world.

The greatest gift we can give our child isn’t to do with awards, it’s the gift of feeling that they matter profoundly. That who they are and what they think is important to those who are closest to them, and that they are loved for who they are, not who we wish they were.

This is an old episode about perfectionism, and how to help our kids overcome it. I think it applies just as much to us parents.

https://www.teenagersuntangled.com/perfectionism-help-your-teen-and-yourself-overcome-the-need-to-be-perfect/

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My email is teenagersuntangled@gmail.com
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You can reach Susie at www.amindful-life.co.uk

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